Alohomora
by MerylJane
Summary: If you had told Kurt a year ago that he'd be spending prom night watching Harry Potter with his boyfriend like a complete loser . . . well, he actually couldn't have been happier.


**AN: I know. I've read some of the spoilers. This so isn't anything like what's happening. I just . . . I have this notion in my head that there's something really beautiful for Kurt and for Burt in the example of the Berrys and think that the dynamic has some sort of potential. And I also like AVPM too much not to write about Blaine and Harry Potter. The story's not perfect yet, but I'm always writing Klaine scenes just for my own entertainment and needed to post _something_ while I had the nerve.**

**Oh, and I totally know that Rachel and Finn's relationship is completely non-canon here. I started this story a long time ago.**

**Anyway, this will have another chapter.**

Kurt had planned to go by the office and pick up a guest form that Monday after school and he would have, if only his hair hadn't been so sticky. And if he hadn't just wanted to go home and curl up in his bed and never come out again.

And possibly invite Blaine to join him first.

Except, he didn't want his boyfriend to see him like that. He didn't want Blaine to know just how different McKinley was from Dalton. He wanted his boyfriend to hold on to the fantasies he'd been building – _maybe_ with a little help from Kurt – of Kurt adjusting, of Kurt getting along just fine, of Kurt never ever being pushed into lockers or slushied or spoken to or even _looked at_ unkindly, just by the sheer force of _them_.

But Blaine had called him right at that moment, saying _did he want to get coffee?_ and _he would even let Kurt pay for a cookie if he would share one with him_ and _the Warblers sounded great with their new song but _damn_ they needed a countertenor. _And Kurt couldn't _not _meet his boyfriend for coffee, especially because he really, really wanted to see that they were at different schools, he cherished the precious little time he had with him. So, reaching for the moist towelettes he kept in his glove compartment, Kurt had worked as much of stickiness as he could out of his hair and driven to the Lima Bean.

They had gotten coffee and kissed and conversed and _kissed_ and Kurt had _not_ asked his boyfriend to prom.

Now it was Saturday night, _the_ Saturday of_ the_ prom and Kurt was asking his boyfriend if he thought Kurt could be a Ravenclaw. He asked this with a secret hope that Blaine would tell him he _no, was a Gryffindor_ _through and through_, and his boyfriend didn't disappoint. "Kurt, I think you'd be like Hermione. She's the cleverest witch of her age, but her courage is so remarkable that the sorting hat just _has_ to put her in Gryffindor."

Kurt only hoped that he could be braver next year.

Because this year, Kurt was being rather cowardly. This year, Kurt was lounging on the couch in his living room with his boyfriend, sinking into movie number two of a seven-movie Harry Potter marathon because Blaine had nearly clawed his own eyes out when Kurt had said confessed to never having seen the films _or_ read the books. Kurt didn't say it out loud – it would hurt his image – but Blaine knew it had to do with protecting his image. After all, Kurt couldn't be gay and a countertenor and_ fabulous _and exceptionally fashionable, _and_ a Harry Potter geek. Alone, _that_ was a certain line Kurt hadn't dared cross. But, with Blaine, all the superficial reasons for cultivating his interests fell away.

They'd ordered pizza for the occasion. Kurt was still reeling from the Whomping Willow incident when the doorbell rang. "Alohomora!" Kurt shrieked as he threw open the door, Blaine right behind him, wrapping an arm around Kurt's should for support as he doubled over in laughter at Kurt's heartfelt attempt at geekiness – it would help his cause if he used the spell _correctly_, but it was close enough.

But instead of their usual pizza delivery woman, a good-humored, HP-obsessed college student, they saw a short brunette in a sparkly but tasteful dress. "Rachel!" Kurt said in alarm, standing primly and accidentally jostling Blaine's arm from its place in his shoulder.

He'd almost forgotten what tonight _wasn't._

Blaine was too dapper to remember that it would bother Kurt when he said, "You look lovely tonight, Rachel."

Before Blaine could ask what the occasion was, Kurt squirmed away with a mumbled, "I'm going to go get Finn."

He pranced down the hall. "Finn Hudson, your date is here so you'd better get up here soon unless you want to look like a jerk!" he called down the stairs. "Or a _girl_," he muttered drily.

Finn began to speak, sounding flustered, so Kurt walked down to meet him. "Kurt, I need help with my tie. You said you'd help me and then you forgot and Blaine came over, and . . . I thought we'd be doing this together," Finn, who had been confused when Kurt had told him the day before that he wouldn't be joining him at prom, rambled.

"Finn," Kurt said sharply, walking toward him, his voice simultaneously affectionate and annoyed. He reached to his neck and undid the tangle his step-brother had gotten himself into, re-tying the fabric, a borrowed piece from Kurt's wardrobe, with stoic precision. "I'm sorry that it bothers you that I won't be going to prom. But you're going to be fine. And you're going to have a fantastic time with Rachel."

Meanwhile, two proud-looking, beaming men had joined their daughter at the door, and Blaine hadn't known it was p_ossible_ to feel as awkward and embarrassed as he did. "It's good to see you again, Blaine," Leroy said.

"Yes. Good to see you, too," he told the three of them, nodding at them and feeling like Finn's room downstairs was very far away. Going on a date with Rachel Berry meant getting to be grilled by not one but two overprotective fathers. Even if he _had _been bisexual, the experience may have been enough to make him swear off girls forever.

Blaine focused his attention on Rachel. "What's the occasion?" he asked, gesturing to her dress.

Rachel, apparently for the first time, noticed his sweatpants and Gryffindor t-shirt ("That's _repulsive_," Kurt had said earlier that evening, lips caressing his jaw).

Before Rachel could recover enough from her horror to speak, Hiram asked conversationally, "You're not going to prom, Blaine?" Rachel's horror, to her credit, did appear like the genuine kind rather than the Star Rachel Berry Acts Horrified kind.

Blaine Looked Confused (not the genuine kind) and surprised (not at all an act), but a gnawing pain settled in his stomach. "Well . . . um, I actually go to Dalton Academy and we're all b – we don't have a prom. But, no, I don't think . . . not that I'm aware of . . ."

Rachel continued to look_ appalled_. "Did the school not give you guys _tickets_?"

"I just didn't want to go, Rachel!" Kurt shouted from the stairwell as he ascended, having heard her question and begun to roll his eyes in annoyance. "My God, we know you have _two gay dads_! Get _over_ yoursel – oh, um, hello."

"Kurt, is it?"

Kurt nodded, uncomfortable that he'd just insulted a girl in front of her not one but two fathers. "Sorry, Rachel."

"Yeah, thank you for your concern," Blaine said, his own concerned eyes fixing on Kurt. He tried to catch his boyfriend's gaze, but Kurt's eyes fell toward the floor after making brief contact with Rachel's.

Kurt realized he wasn't being a very good host, so he invited the family inside.

"Kurt, you've told me before how much you wanted to go to prom," Rachel said. Blaine turned sharply at this revelation.

"Well, I had better things to do tonight, Rachel!" The flat screen in the room was paused on twelve-year-old Hermione Granger's precocious face, so the remark didn't quite carry the bite he'd intended it to.

Hiram shot his daughter a stern look.

Blaine could win and had, as a young boy at cotillion, won awards for his charm. "Your dress is gorgeous, Rachel." The compliment didn't carry much weight, though, as his eyes still watched Kurt's face.

Still, it made Kurt smile. "Kurt picked it out," Rachel divulged eagerly.

This made Blaine _actually _look at the dress, only to shift his gaze back to his uncomfortable boyfriend. "It's beautiful," he murmured. He looked back to Rachel. "You look amazing, Rachel."

"Well, Kurt owed me after that last makeover he gave me," she said.

At this point, Finn finally came barreling into the room, looking actually rather classy for once. "Good evening, Mr. Berries," he greeted.

"Finn," Kurt whispered in that way that only a step-brother could get away with, "it's like cul_s_-de-sac._ Misters_ Berry."

"When have you ever seen multiple cul-de-sacs in one place?" Finn countered. Kurt thought his head might combust from frustration, heightened by the stress of the situation, when Blaine found his eyes. First, he felt embarrassed shame, but the softness and warmth of his boyfriend's irises sucked it away. He smiled at him apologetically.

"Or attorney_s_ general," Blaine said amicably, in an honest-to-God attempt to help. "You make the noun plural, not the adjective."

"Your name isn't an_ adjective_," Finn protested, looking apologetically to Rachel's parents as if Blaine and Kurt were insulting them.

Rachel chimed in with an affectionate, "Blaine, the intricacies of grammar are really a lost cause with this one." Here, Kurt allowed himself to smirk lightly.

"Finn, this is the part where you compliment your date on her beauty," Kurt continued in his former tone's softer, cuddlier sister. And Finn returned with a scandalized stage whisper of, "Not with her _dads_ here, Kurt, gosh."

"Kurt, you go to McKinley, right? Are you not attending prom tonight?" a Mr. Berry asked, apparently not having put the pieces of the situation together. Kurt was, like Blaine, wearing sweatpants, though he knew for a fact that they were more expensive than Rachel's dress.

Kurt felt ashamed for a reason he couldn't explain as he said, "No, sir. I'm not."

The other Mr. Berry looked to his husband anxiously. "Did you not hear Blaine?" And the realization, colored by sadness, dawned on the first Mr. Berry's face.

Kurt choked back a groan and an eye-roll.

And Rachel, because she's Rachel, just had to contribute, "Kurt and Blaine are dating, Dad. Blaine's gay; he was only dating me in a fit of confusion which has since been resolved._ I_ helped him confirm his sexuality," she said proudly, still excited about the songs she had gotten out of the experience which hadn't been horrendous but that Finn had said were fantastic, thereby sparking their reunion.

Kurt took a deep breath. "Carole's just getting the film for her camera together, but I thought we could do pictures on the staircase and then some on the porch, once the sun begins to set, perhaps." Kurt hated to be pitied. Yes, he liked attention, yes, he liked people to notice him, but he really didn't like to draw attention to his _emotions_. To his personal, _private_ problems.

"Great," they agreed, busying themselves with cameras and flowers.

When Carole and Burt entered the room, enough bustle ensued for Blaine to pull Kurt aside inconspicuously and pin him against the sunny yellow wall of the Hummel-Hudson's new front hall. "_Kurt_," he murmured.

Kurt squirmed. "We'll get back to Harry Potter soon. I'm sorry about this temporary invasion. I just forgot to tell you." Real embarrassment, real guilt, burned beneath his superficial placeholder of an apology.

Blaine stared at his boyfriend, eyes heavy with concern. "We'll get back to Harry Potter soon," he told him with a smirk that he'd had to work to force out. He kissed the boy's forehead several times, gently and carefully, before he let him go.

"I'm sorry," Kurt said again and that was the exact thing Blaine didn't want to hear him say. He was disappointed that he hadn't been able to kiss the shame out of him.

**AN: There will be more to this plotless monstrosity. Be prepared for lots and lots of _feelings._**


End file.
